Finally

The house voted to change back the ethics rules that were initially changed to protect Tom Delay and probably do some other things. What things? nobody is really to sure, but it was definitely there to protect Delay. The vote to change the rules was nearly unanimous, only 20 representatives voted against it (all of them Republican). Now the ethics committee will meet and there can be a thorough investigation of Mr. Delay... Finally

Kraut Juice?

The other day while shopping at Milam's market, the height of convenient shopping and courteous staffers. As Mere and I wandered through the inconvenient and poorly stocked maze that is Milam's we stumbled across something that i had never seen before, Kraut Juice! I can't really understand why someone would specifically need just the juice of sauerkraut. Maybe it is the new Celray? I would also really like to know how many Krauts must one squeeze to get one can of Kraut juice? Is there an alcoholic version i can buy? i'm really missing a nice vinegar based liquor from my collection.


Possible slogans:
Hey, It tastes better than crap!
Now with chunks of Kraut in every gulp!
It'll leave your insides polished and shiny!
You can buy it by the ton on Ebay!

Baby Bulls!

For those of y'all that don't know...the baby bulls are for real. Despite being down two starters, one of them being the leading scorer on the team the Bulls have taken the first game from the Wizards (103-94)! This was done on the strong young backs of the Bull's fantastic rookies Ben Gordon , and Andres Nocioni . Gordon scored 30, 12 of which came in the 4th quarter and Nocioni scored 25 pts and gobbled up 18 boards! If the Bulls win this series it will be the first time a team has won a playoff series without their leading scorer since the 1998 Knicks did it without the Haitian Sasquatch! Props to P-Ew! GO BULLS!

Mike Williams

I'm going to come right out and say it: I want my beloved bears to draft MIKE WILLIAMS!

The guy didnt' play any football last year, but....
- he didn't drop a ball during his 90 minute long workout
- 40 time was sub 4.6
In two years at USC (26 games):
- he caught 176 passes
- averaging 14.6 yds/catch
oh, and 30 catches were for touchdowns!
The guy is a stud!
DRAFT MIKE WILLIAMS!!!!!!

Why Gov. Blagojevich is the man.....

There is a growing battle around whether pharmacists can refuse to carry and sell the "morning after" pill. I personally think that it is bullshit to be a pharmacist and not sell this product to people because the pharmacist disagrees with the morality of the pill. Allowing pharmacists to do this would take all the power from the legislature and the courts and place it solely in the hands of "Joe-Shmoe Pharmacist". I know i didn't vote for any pharmacists!
Gov. Rod R. Blagojevich, at least has the stones to stand up to this lunacy. The Governor passed an emergency law requiring pharmacies to stock and distribute the pill when requested. GOOD FOR YOU ROD!!

Just as a side note: I know Gov. Blagojevich is rather young and he has a funny name but wouldn't he be great in '08? Maybe people got it right suspecting that Illinois might produce a presidential candidate but nobody thought it might be Rod.

Possible election slogans (posts containing new slogans are appreciated) :
In Rod we trust!!!
Vote Blagojevich! (he smells like pine!)
Vote B! (yes this taken directly from those insufferable "W" stickers)

Don't trust those bastards!

Hey,
You know me, i'm Sam Watterson or you might know me as Jack McCoy; the straight shooting rough and tumble District attorney on Law and Order. I'm here to tell you today to not trust those fucking sons of bitches Merrill and Schwab! Merrill, is a thief and a cheat. My god, he is nothing but a bull and not even a man! Would you give your money to a fucking bull?
With Chuck you might as well be giving your money to a retarded chimp!
Why just the other day i tried to invest a paltry $500,000, that I earned for being the straight-shootingest sonuvabitch on TV, with Chucky Schwab and he told me to go fuck myself! Well I retorted: "Nobody Talks to tv star Sam Waterston like that you pasty biatch! I'm going to go invest with T.D. Water-muthafucking-house!". T.D. Waterhouse, its the bomb!


Thanks,

Sam Waterston

The old Gannon Post

If you want to see a video of the Jeff Gannon talk, the one with the oddly-colored visual aide, on C-Span you can find it here. it is great!

Mr. President you are hilarious!

If you like a good video of President Bush having trouble speaking, and just being generally hilarious then there is a funny video at dnext.com.

Keep it coming!

The Senate confirmed one of Pres. Bush's judicial nominees yesterday. The guy was a reasonable appointment and absolutely no one voted against the appointment. Yet there will still be a big stink once the Democrats in the Senate filibuster the 10 miscreant Jerks that the President wants to appoint to a federal bench. I know the tide of hypocrisy flows freely in Washington but in this instance the hypocrisy lies with the republicans whining about filibusters being used against the most extreme of the President's judicial nominees. Bush has a higher confirmation rate than Clinton, and the Republican's didn't mind the existence of a filibuster when it meant keeping his appointees of the bench.

In short, I say keep confirming all the reasonable judges and make it news! bombard the public with a confirmation a week and then when you get to the unreasonable appointments just say "NO!". If the Republicans won't budge on the nominees then the Democrats shouldn't budge on the Filibuster!

Even More Tom Delay

As The Funk posted yesterday, Republicans are starting to flee from Tom Delay suggesting that he should step down as the Majority leader in the House. Will Mr. Delay fade out of the spotlight gracefully or will he fight to retain the power and prestige that he has accumulated over the years? It will be interesting to see whether the orders to step down come from Republican-high-command and whether they are immediately followed by Mr. Delay. The Strength of the Republican party in particular the conservative movement is its solidarity. I don't know whether Tom Delay would be willing to sacrifice his political power to preserve the unity of his party. I could see it going both ways. Clearly it would be best for the Republicans if Delay steps down as Majority leader and he simply stops being such a lightning rod. What would be best for the Dems, and the one that I think is most likely to happen, is that Mr. Delay refuses to yield his power and force the Republican's into a nasty position. They would either have to act to get rid of Mr. Delay, and he clearly has his supporters and it will divide the party, or they could leave him be and simply try to distance themselves from him. This would leave Mr. Delay as a campaign issue, which would be great.
No matter which road the Republican party chooses it will deflect attention from President Bush's agenda on Social Security. Good luck conservatives.

What the fuck....

maybe the weirdest news story....ever!

Ladies and Gentlemen....JEFF GANNON!

There was a recent post on Wonkette about Jeff Guck....errr...Jeff Gannon, Male Pornstar and conservative news reporter. This is what he had to say:


"I brought a visual aid. Even though this represents the red/blue county map, it's actually green because I ran out of ink on my printer. But see all the green out there? Those are the people that are interested in the questions that I ask."

For a good time i'd also recommend JeffGannon.com
I found it to be a delightful melange of arrogance and ignorance. Who could forget, apparently now defunct news outlet Talon News, the "news" outlet Gannon was working for when he was issued a press pass to the Whitehouse. Talon News now only has this to say:

The recent public focus on Talon News, while much of it malicious, has indeed brought some constructive elements to the surface. It has also brought many kind messages of support, and for that we are extremely grateful.

In order to better serve those readers across the country who enjoy Talon News content and look forward to receiving it each day, we feel compelled to reevaluate operations in order to provide the highest quality, most professional product possible.

Thus, Talon News will be offline while we redesign the web site, perform a top-to-bottom review of staff and volunteer contributors, and address future operational procedures.

We look forward to bringing an even better product to our readers in the future.

Jeff Gannon deserves only ridicule and derision. I honestly don't see the point of having him as a guest to anything at all. If he is a journalist he might be the worst journalist of all time. I don't think that it is a stretch to believe that parts of the Whitehouse wanted him there for his softball questions and strong, if ultimately detached from this universe, presence.
It makes a nice package for the administration when you are paying columnists for their support of your programs and there are "plants" in the Whitehouse press-corps to send up and easy question from time to time. This really helps the Whitehouse spread its propaganda...errr...dogma....err "truth" to the people.

VAST LEFT WING CONSPIRACY???

So the Memo about the republicans politicizing Terri Schiavo's condition has come out to be true. The existence of this memo was first reported on ABC news and almost immediately the Conservatives attempted to discredit the memo by accusing the Democrats of writing it and trying to use it against the conservatives. However it is now being reported by the Washington Post that Brian H. Darling, one of Mel Martinez's aides

(R-FL),
was actually the author of the memo. (by reporting I mean that Martinez has admitted that Darling is the author in an interview) So the story is that; not only was there a clear indication that some conservatives in the Senate were using the Schiavo situation for political gain but also attempted to frame the Democrats for a memo the Conservatives wrote!
I know that Conservatives are touchy about documents after the National Guard conflagaration but not everything is a plot by the Democrats. I wonder if the party's have completely switched places and now conservatives are concerned about the "Vast Left-Wing Conspiracy"! So the moral of the story is: "Don't throw stones when you're the ones that author a damning Memo". Just take your lumps and admit your own Jerkishness!

This is just a little list of Bloggers and Talking heads that now have Crow to eat over the memo.
thanks Daily Kos

Sen. Bennet:

Sen. Robert F. Bennett, Utah Republican, said the issue "stinks" of a news fabrication similar to the one that engulfed CBS anchorman Dan Rather during the 2004 presidential campaign, after he reported that President Bush did not fulfill his duties while in the National Guard, citing documents that CBS later admitted could not be authenticated.

Tucker Carlson:

"Last week a memo surfaced, reportedly written by the Republican members of Congress explaining how to make hay with the Terri Schiavo case, the Talking Points Memo, Ah, I think within a week or two it will become clear that that memo was a forgery, possibly written by Democrats on the hill in an effort to discredit Republicans. Bloggers are saying that now and it sounds like they may be right."

Fred Barnes:

"So rather than an example of aggressive reporting, the memo story turns out to be yet another instance of crude liberal bias, in this case against both Republicans and those who fought to have Schiavo's feeding tube restored. Naturally, the memo had a second life when the story was picked up by other news outlets, pundits, and columnists. How did ABC and others get wind of the memo in the first place? It came from 'Democratic aides,' according to the New York Times, who 'said it had been distributed to Senate Republicans.' Not exactly a disinterested source."

Newsmax:

There was just one problem: Closer examination by The American Spectator, talk show hosts Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity, The Weekly Standard, and Accuracy in Media (AIM) indicates that the memo is a fraud - a political dirty trick, if you will, specifically aimed at causing public revulsion at Republicans.

Rush Limbaugh:

"Truth Detector: Supposed GOP Schiavo Memo Forged by Democrats."

Michelle Malkin:

I suspect that no one at the Post or ABC News still believes the amateurish, unsigned, misspelled memo was circulated by Republican Party leaders.

Accuracy in Media:

Accuracy in Media today questioned the authenticity of the much-publicized "GOP Talking Points" memo on the Terri Schiavo case.

In the Agora:

On Friday four staffers accused a renegade aide to Sen. Harry Reid (D-NV) of distributing forged "talking points" to members of the media and claiming Republican authorship. In the Agora's extensive investigations in the alleged "GOP" Schiavo talking points memo reveal possible tricks from low level Democratic aides. Two of the four GOP staffers tell ITA they were eyewitnesses to the exchange.

Ass Rocket:

In the meantime, there is not a bit of evidence connecting the memo to any Republican, and, for all of the reasons we have repeatedly spelled out on this site, there are excellent reasons to believe it is a hoax perpetrated by still-unidentified Democrats.

Tom Delay is going down.

Where there is smoke there has to be fire. Tom Delay is going down despite conservatives closing ranks. the snowball is getting bigger and it is going to bury him.



how can this guy be trusted?

Gay marriage not cool. Marrying your first cousin cool!

There is an article on CNN today about first cousins getting married. Apparently the issue whether 1st cousins can marry is reserved to the states. Some states, like PA don't allow 1st cousins to get married. (a stance that i think is entirely appropriate) Other States like MD allow first cousins to get married. (which, lets face it, is just plain gross.) But if you're one of the 26 states that allow first cousins to get married how can you take a stand against gay marriage? If this Statement:

"People don't like what they don't understand," said Smith, who fell in love with her husband after seeing him at a family reunion.

doesn't give you the heebeejeebees then i really don't see how Homosexuality can freak you out.

I find it much less strange for two men or two women to fall in love and want to get married than too have a young woman gazing longingly into her Father's-Brother's-Son's eyes.

Hapy Birthday to ME!

In, what can only be considered an extremely bold new direction, the Catholic church has elevated one of the least pious from the rank and file to the highest position in all of Christendome! Erik has been named Pope Julesius I!!!!!!!!!!!!!